I Smell a Rat

“Do you know what Denise?” Keith exclaimed as he rolled over in bed, nearly sending Denise’s prized ‘I don’t argue, I just explain why I’m right’ mug across the room. “Yes” groaned Denise. “I am smelling a rat!” Said Keith. “Bloody hell, they aren’t back are they, they cost a fortune to get rid….” Responded Denise. “No, no, Denise, not a real rat!” interrupted Keith. “It’s about that bill to ‘fix’ the shower. I reckon that property maintenance companies are in bed with the agent. Why does it always seem to cost us about 20% more when they use their guys?'”. “You’ve got a point there Keith” Denise admitted reluctantly “I bet that 20% is going straight in the agent’s back pocket!” continued Denise reflecting on this uncharacteristic cynicism. “And what does my dad always say Keith?”. “Double Deckers aren’t as big as they used to be?” Responded Keith. 

“No! If you want a job done properly, do it yourself!’ Denise curtly responded. “Oh yeah, how is his back now!?” Keith chuckled. “Very funny Keith”, said Denise. “To be fair, even your dad could press a booster switch without needing a trip to A&E!” Keith was becoming overcome with his own wit. “I am not laughing Keith. When you have picked yourself off the floor, I want you to ring our agent and find out the deal” ordered Denise. “Okay love” Keith sniffed through tears of laughter reaching out to hold Denise’s hand. Denise pulled Keith close. “I think you’d look good in overalls”. “I have some in the loft, hold that thought” Replied Keith. Denise beamed.